Cursed Life
by pingo1387
Summary: At a festival one night, Sanji manages to humiliate the wrong guy. Can he live his new life without being discovered by his crewmates? 5
1. A Festival and a Strange Man!

**This is set between Water 7 and Thriller Bark. Also, thank you to my friend Rin-chan (you know who you are) for helping me out with this chapter :)**

* * *

"We're almost there! I see it!" said Nami happily. "It's Noepe Island!"

"Really!?" Luffy ran up to the edge of the Sunny, almost falling overboard in his excitement. The island had a large port, with plenty of room to dock the ship. People were bustling about, taking items from large cargo ships, while others exited passenger ships, some visiting the island, some coming home. There were buildings dotting the sides of the street, and there seemed to be an awful lot of people around, apparently putting up booths and other things. A large maple tree was in the center of the town, all of its leaves a pleasant red-orange color and a few starting to float down.

"Good, it doesn't look scary…" sighed Usopp with relief. "I wonder what those people are doing, though…"

After Franky had docked the ship and furled the sails, the eight Strawhats got off the ship and went to where some of the townsfolk were setting up a booth. A sign with the words 'RING TOSS' was on the ground next to them.

"Oi, pops!" called Luffy to an older man. The man looked up. "What's going on here?"

"You're travelers, aren't you?" asked the man, looking around at them. "We're setting up for the Maple Festival, of course! Every year, on the same day in fall, the maple tree—" he gestured to the large tree "—sheds its leaves starting in the evening and ending sometime around midnight. They don't come down all at once, of course, so it's very beautiful. We have a festival every year to celebrate it! You're very fortunate to have come at this time."

"That's awesome!" Luffy yelled. He started talking excitedly with Usopp and Chopper about the festival.

"Excuse me, sir," said Nami politely, "do you know how long the Log takes for this island?"

"Log? Oh, er…" he scratched his head. "About a week, I think."

"A week, huh…? Okay, thank you."

They continued down the street, where others were setting up different booths. They saw several sweet-making places, including ice cream and fudge, and a carousel, which one of the townsfolk said was the oldest carousel in the world. They also learned that the island was a summer island, and that the town was called Maple Cliff.

"Seems like a good place," said Sanji approvingly as they headed up an empty street. "Quiet, not too hot… the people are nice and the ladies are beautiful…"

"Nami! Can we please have some money for tonight?" asked Chopper. Usopp and Luffy nodded and held out their hands. Nami sighed.

"Just a little bit. Spend it wisely!" she gave them each some money.

"Yay! I'm gonna buy a bronze statue!"

"There's not enough here for that, Luffy!"

"Well, I don't care about festivals," muttered Zoro. "I'll just stay and guard the ship."

"You're boring, Zoro!" complained Luffy.

"Boring!" echoed Usopp.

"Boring!" echoed Chopper.

"Boring!" echoed Franky.

"Boring!" echoed Sanji.

"Shut up!" Zoro snapped. "I do what I want!"

Nami groaned. "Shut up, all of you!"

"Yes, Nami-_swan_~!"

* * *

At the festival that night, bright lights were strung around the streets, buildings, and booths. Luffy, Usopp, Franky, and Chopper strolled down the street in their _yukata_s (which everyone else in the group was wearing as well).

"I wish Zoro had come…" Luffy sighed.

"He would have just been grumpy," said Usopp, waving his hand. He pointed to a building. "Look, there's an ice cream place! Let's get something!"

A few minutes later, they strolled out with large ice creams in their hands: Lobster ice cream for Luffy (the others were a bit disgusted that the place even _had_ lobster ice cream); pistachio for Usopp; peanut butter for Franky, and bubblegum for Chopper.

"Ooh, that ring toss thing is set up!" exclaimed Chopper, pointing at the booth. "Let's try it!"

"Mkay!" mumbled Luffy with the pointy end of his ice cream cone sticking out of his mouth like a bird's beak. The three ran up to the booth, where a middle-aged man was standing behind the counter.

"You wanna play?" he asked as they reached the table. "Two beris per turn!"

Usopp dug a bill out of his pocket. The man gave him three beris in exchange, as well as three rings. He explained the rules: Get one ring on the peg, and you get a small prize. Get two rings, and you get two small prizes. Get all three rings, and you get your choice of three small prizes or one big prize.

"Alright…" Usopp stood back a bit, examining the peg sticking out of the wall behind the man. He made a motion as if to throw the ring. He closed one eye. Suddenly he tossed the ring, making a perfect miss.

He hung his head dejectedly. Chopper patted him on the back.

"Well, no matter!" he exclaimed, lifting his head so suddenly that his neck cracked. "I still have two more rings!"

He made two more tosses, one with each ring, and managed to get them both on the peg that time. After a bit of cheering and high-fiving, he picked out two toy cars ("To take apart later," he explained) and stepped aside for Luffy, who had been jumping up and down, both out of anticipation and the fact that he'd swallowed the rest of his ice cream and cone whole.

He paid the man and grabbed the rings. He held all three of them in one hand, twirling them around a finger.

"What, are you going to try for all three at once?" asked the man. "Sonny, let me tell you something: There is no way you can get all three on at once—"

Luffy stretched his arm out and gently hung the rings on the peg. The man's jaw dropped to the floor. "What—what—"

"Yay! I got them on!" Luffy cheered. "I'm gonna get a big prize!"

"Now, hold on!" the man blustered indignantly. "What was that!?"

"Devil Fruit," said Usopp matter-of-factly.

"Um, okay, but I hardly think that's fair, don't you? You can have the same turn, but no using any weird powers this time!"

"But you didn't say anything about _not_ using Devil Fruit powers," Chopper pointed out innocently. The man groaned.

"Fine, I'll make an exception. But if you go again, you can't use that weird power, okay?"

"Sure, that's fine. Now, what should I get…?"

Luffy ended up choosing a plastic statue of Gold Roger, about the size of his head. Chopper had a turn and got two pegs on, so he chose the plastic glasses with funny nose and mustache and a conical party hat, which he placed on top of his regular hat. Franky chose not to play.

* * *

"Oh?" said Sanji, examining the barbecue on shish kebabs. "This is some fine meat… is it ham? No, beef? Weird, I can't tell… what is it, mister?"

"Well," said the plump man behind the table, "it's actually a mix of them! So it's no wonder you couldn't tell."

"I see…" Sanji paid the man and took a stick. He chomped down on the meat while strolling down the way, looking for more things to do. He spotted the Ring Toss booth and headed over, finishing off the meat and tossing the stick in a garbage can.

"Hey, how much to play?" he asked the man.

"It's two beris per turn," he replied. Sanji paid him and took the three rings after the man explained the rules.

"Now before you go," he said quickly, "you don't have any weird powers, do you? Like a Devil Fruit?"

"Devil Fruit? No, why?"

"Four guys came by a few minutes ago and one of them used Devil Fruit powers to get all three on the peg. I'd rather that not happen again."

"…was the guy wearing a straw hat?"

"As a matter of fact, he was. Do you know him?"

"Unfortunately, yes. I don't have any Devil Fruit powers, though."

Sanji took his turn and only got one ring on the peg. He kept paying the man and trying until he got two big prizes – two large stuffed animals, a teddy bear and a dolphin.

"Thanks, mister," he said, running off to find Nami and Robin.

Along the way, he noticed something out of the corner of his eye. He turned and saw a rather annoying-looking man with red hair and freckles tugging on a woman's arm.

"Hey, girly," he said. "Why don'tcha come home with me? We can have a bit of fun, you know!"

The woman squirmed, but his grip was tight. "Let _go_ of me, you pervert! I'm not going anywhere with you!"

"Aw, come on, girly!" he protested, yanking on her arm and making her let out a gasp of pain. "I promise it'll be great fun! We can do all sorts of things together!"

"Here, hold these," said Sanji to a passerby. He shoved the toys in the guy's arms and approached the man and the woman.

"Oi, jerk, didn't you hear her?" he growled as he reached them. "Let her go."

"Yeah?" the man turned to glare at him. "And you're gonna make me, I s'ppose?"

"You got that right," said Sanji, delivering a roundhouse kick into the man's gut. The man let go of the woman in shock. Sanji flipped himself so that he was standing on his hands and drove his heel into his shoulder. The man collapsed to the ground, twitching. The small crowd that had formed cheered and Sanji took a bow.

"Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week," he said, partially joking. As the crowd dispersed, the woman thanked him and was on her way before he could say "Mellorine~".

As Sanji took the toys back from the guy he'd asked to hold them, he felt a tap on his shoulder. When he turned around, he saw that it was the man he'd kicked down, who had apparently struggled to his feet.

"Hey, brother, those were some pretty nice moves," he said. "Why don't you come with me and I'll show you something neat?"

"Oh? Sounds interesting."

The red-haired man led him through a dark alleyway into an empty back road. He held up a finger and took out a piece of chalk. He knelt down and started drawing something.

"You believe in magic, brother?" he asked as he drew.

"Magic? Of course not," said Sanji, waving a hand.

"Then you're in for a surprise. I've got a neat little trick to show you. Stand here," he added, indicating the center of the pentagram he'd just drawn.

Sanji raised his visible eyebrow and stepped in the center, muttering "No harm… magic isn't real."

The man took out a book and flipped through the pages, holding up a finger. He raised the hand that wasn't holding the book and started to chant.

"_A desruc efil uoy tsum evil won, desruc ot evil tuohtiw eht nus…_"

The circle started glowing. Sanji looked down in surprise.

"_Desruc ot evil no s'retho doolb, desruc ot eid morf a elgnis tnalp… desruc ot evil tuohtiw egdelwonk fo ruoy skool… i dnammoc ti ot eb os!_"

The light from the circle lifted up, surrounded Sanji briefly, and faded. Sanji clapped.

"Nice trick. I'll be going now." He stepped out of the chalk circle and pointed a finger at the red-haired man. "You'd better not bug any more ladies, jerk."

"I promise," said the man innocently. Sanji went back through the alleyway he'd come from.

* * *

Nami and Robin walked down the street with the fudge they'd bought at the candy place. As they finished it off, they heard a voice behind them.

"Nami-_swan_! Robin-_chwan_! I have a present for you~!"

They turned around to find Sanji running towards them with two large stuffed animals. "For you…" he said, handing Nami the dolphin one. "…And for you!" he gave the teddy bear to Robin.

"Thank you, Sanji-_kun_!"

"Thank you, Sanji. It's very cute."

"Anytime, my dears~!" he went off somewhere else.

"Do you think we could find some furniture for the Sunny here?" asked Nami.

"We can look around," replied Robin.

"Ooh! Maybe we can try that ring toss first!"

They approached the ring toss booth. The man behind the table smiled at them.

"Hello, ladies! Would you like to try the ring toss? Two beris per turn!"

"Too expensive!" said Nami. "One beri!"

"It's two!"

"Half a beri!"

"You went down!"

Eventually Nami got it to one beri per turn. The man sighed. "Okay, fine. Before you start, do either of you have Devil Fruit powers? No, never mind, you probably don't. Here are your rings…"

Nami managed to get one ring on, getting her a plastic bracelet. Robin took a turn next and got all three on with her power, sprouting an arm near the peg and hanging them there. The man's jaw dropped to the ground for the second time that day.

"What—damn it! I knew I should have made sure!" he fumed. "Fine, take your prize!"

Robin chose a model of the world and the two girls set off.


	2. Odd Happenings! What's Wrong With Sanji?

Sanji sat up and yawned. He had gotten a good night's rest, despite the fact that he had been disappointed at not being able to pick up any girls. Swinging his legs over his bed, he climbed the ladder and exited to the deck, where the sky in the east was turning a vivid orange-red. He entered the kitchen and started getting out ingredients and other things.

In just ten minutes, he'd finished mixing up the muffin batter and was pouring it into the tray moulds. After sticking it into the oven and setting the timer for thirty minutes, he got out some eggs and began cracking them into the pan he'd placed on the stove in order to make scrambled eggs.

The first batch of eggs was finished fairly quickly. Sanji grabbed a fork and took a bit to taste-test it; to make sure that they weren't overcooked. But upon tasting it, he spat it out into the sink almost immediately: the taste was vile.

He rinsed his mouth out with water and tried another bite, only to be met with the same results. He spit it out again and wiped his mouth. Something strange was definitely going on.

"Hey!" he yelled, looking out the door, where Usopp, Luffy, and Chopper were playing a game. They looked up. "Usopp, get in here for a moment!"

Usopp looked at the others, shrugged, and made his way over to the kitchen. "Yeah?"

"Mind tasting this for me?" Sanji shoved a forkful of eggs at Usopp.

"Why can't you do it yourself?"

"I need a second opinion. Just taste it."

"Okay…" Usopp took the fork and popped the cooked egg in his mouth. He chewed it and swallowed. Sanji looked at him expectantly.

"It tastes great!" said Usopp, smiling. "Right up there with your usual awesome cooking!"

"You're sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. Can I go now?"

"Sure…" Sanji waved him away and started cooking the second batch, bothered by the fact that his taste buds seemed to be off today. Maybe he was coming down with a cold?

Once everything was done, he yelled for the guys to come in and sweetly called the girls. The men came running in, ready for their morning nourishment, while the girls walked behind them. They sat themselves and Sanji served up the muffins and eggs.

"Where's the moss-head?" he asked, noting Zoro's absence.

"He was still sleeping when we left," said Chopper.

"Geez… I hope he didn't eat that weird mushroom again…" Sanji stepped outside, where the sun was fully above the horizon now. When the light touched his skin, it burned as if he had stuck it in a fire. He quickly stepped back inside to the shade, blowing on the spot that had burned.

"Uh, Chopper, do you mind waking up the idiot? I'm going to make some more eggs…"

"Okay!" Chopper unquestioningly left the table and ran back to the men's room. Sanji started cooking more eggs, a bit distractedly.

"Good breakfast, Sanji!" Nami complimented, swallowing a bite of muffin.

"Meah! Itchs r'lly gud!" Luffy mumbled around his food.

The others said similar words of praise as Chopper came into the kitchen with Zoro. Sanji discreetly picked a corner off of one of the muffins and tried it, only to find that it had a disgusting flavor equal to that of the egg. He spat it into a napkin, deciding to keep his troubled taste buds to himself for now, figuring that they would go back to normal later – maybe he'd just had too much to drink last night?

They finished their breakfast soon enough, leaving Sanji to clean up the dishes. He was still thinking about what had happened – the horrible taste of his food when everyone else said that it was delicious, and the morning light burning his skin. Not only that, but why did he feel so damn _thirsty_?

He decided to try stepping outside again. The sun was higher than it had been, completely illuminating the ship. When he stepped outside, his skin burned and sizzled – he could actually hear a hissing sound.

"Tch!" he muttered, stepping back inside and shutting the door. While running cold water on the burned area, he tried to figure out what was causing his sudden extreme sensitivity to light.

The door opened and sunlight poured in. Sanji jumped out of the path of the beam and looked to see Luffy grinning in the doorway.

"Hi, Sanji!" he said happily. "Can I have second breakfast?"

"There's no such thing as second breakfast," Sanji said. Luffy walked over to him and started poking him.

"Aw… come on, Sanji… please? Second breakfast? Pleeeeease?"

Sanji smacked his hand away. "No means no—"

He stopped speaking, suddenly noticing Luffy's wrist. The way the blue veins were delicately crisscrossed, how thin the skin was there, how easy it would be to break open…

"Sanji? What's wrong?"

Sanji now looked at Luffy's face, intending to answer, but his eyes were drawn to his neck. That soft place just below the mandible would be so easy to open, and it was pulsing so rhythmically…

_What the hell am I thinking!?_

"Sanji?"

"Nothing's wrong!" he snapped, fighting a strange urge that had come upon him. "Get out!"

"You're mean…" pouted Luffy, leaving the kitchen and shutting the door behind him. Sanji leaned against the counter shakily.

What was wrong with him? Was he really getting sick after all? He felt his forehead, but it seemed like a normal temperature… then again, his hands would probably be the same temperature, so that wasn't a good way to check. Maybe he was flushed? It didn't feel like it, but it didn't hurt to check.

Searching the drawers, he found a small hand mirror and lifted it up. His eyes widened. In the mirror, the kitchen was reflected – _behind_ Sanji. In fact, everything was reflected except for Sanji himself.

Vile taste of normal food. Burning sunlight. Thinking about blood. Not reflected in a mirror.

Well, shit.

_Okay_, he thought. _Calm down. There are worse things than being a vampire. You just have to tell everyone else, and then we'll be able to find a cure… wait. If I tell them, Nami-_swan_ and Robin-_chwan_ will—_

_"Eek! Sanji-_kun_'s a vampire! How scary!" Nami shrieks, running away._

_ "I can't ever be with him now!" Robin wails, running with Nami._

_ "He's a monster!" they yell together._

"I can never let that happen!" Sanji yelled out loud.

"Let what happen?"

Sanji turned around to see Franky standing in the doorway. "Um… nothing."

"Okay, whatever. Strawhat wants to know when lunch is."

"Tell him it'll be at the usual time," Sanji sighed. Franky nodded and left.

But how, he thought, did he even become a vampire? He couldn't recall being bitten – but vampires had some way of wiping the victim's memory, right? Still…

It would be difficult to keep the truth from his crewmates – he already felt guilty about planning to lie to them – but he just couldn't let his Nami-_swan_ and Robin-_chwan_ think of him as a monster!


	3. His First Taste! A Close Call!

Clouds came later that day, blanketing the sky and blocking out the sunlight. Sanji was able to go outside now without anything burning, so he went into town, wanting to quench his thirst. It would be easy, right? He just had to find a lady and—

No! It was his first time drinking from someone! What if he accidentally hurt her?

But then again, drinking from a man wasn't exactly an appealing option.

He scratched his head and looked up suddenly. He was in front of a hospital.

_Perfect._

* * *

The secretary, a woman whose age could probably rival Dr. Kureha's, looked up as Sanji entered.

"Good afternoon, madam," he said. "I was wondering if I could purchase some blood."

She narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. "What d'you need blood for, son? You don't look like a doctor to me."

"Our ship's doctor said that he needs to have some in storage for emergencies," he lied.

She raised an eyebrow and muttered something that he didn't catch. "What type?"

"Er . . . B negative."

She disappeared through a door for a moment, returning with the bag. It was stored in a different bag as well, a plastic sack. He paid her and left quickly.

_Okay_, he thought. _I'll find an alley or something to drink this in. I can't have anyone finding out, especially not my friends, and especially not Nami-_swan_ or—_

"Sanji?"

He looked up to see Robin in front of him. "Robin-_chwan_~! My darling, how are you~?"

"I'm just fine, thanks." She peered into the bag he was carrying and raised her eyebrows. She looked at him.

"Would you mind explaining why you have a bag of blood with you?"

"Ah, well . . . I thought it would help Chopper out in case of a transfusion!" he scratched the back of his neck, beating himself up inside for lying to his lady crewmember.

"I see . . . strange thing to think about, but considerate all the same. By the way, the ship is in the other direction."

"Ah, right . . ."

"I was heading that way anyway," she continued, taking the plastic bag from him. "I'll take it to the ship."

"No, no!" he exclaimed quickly. "I mean . . . Robin-_chwan_, carrying blood is no job for a delicate lady such as yourself!"

"I'm hardly delicate," she retorted gently. "And I mean no offense, but I've probably seen more blood in my lifetime than you have."

And she walked off with the bag in her hand.

He stared after her. He briefly considered running after her and convincing her to hand it over, but that would just make her suspicious.

* * *

The wizened secretary looked up as Sanji entered for the second time that day. "Back again, son?" she asked.

"Er, yes . . ." he said. "Sorry, I got the wrong type. It was B positive that our doctor needed."

She raised an eyebrow and went to retrieve the bag, handing it to him with some suspicion. He paid her again and left, this time looking around to make sure that no one he knew was around.

Surreptitiously moving into an alley, he went behind a building, glanced around one last time, and opened the bag, throwing away the sack.

The blood smelled heavenly. He cautiously raised the bag to his lips and took a sip.

It tasted wonderful, just like it smelled, with a slight lingering taste of zinc. He drank it slowly, wiping his lips when he had finished. He looked at the bag and tossed it into a trash can behind him.

* * *

As he approached the ship, he heard Usopp saying "Okay, everyone, get in there . . ."

"Where's Sanji-_kun_? We need him here too."

"I'll go find him! Everyone should be in this photo!"

Photo? Oh, Usopp wanted to take a group photo. He opened his mouth, about to call them, but then thought of something.

He didn't show up in a mirror, so there was a good chance he wouldn't show up in a photograph, either. And if the others saw that . . .

The horrifying vision of Nami and Robin running away from him flashed through his mind again. He shivered and started away from the ship, but—

"Sanji! There you are!"

He froze and turned to see Luffy waving at him over the side of the Sunny. "We're taking a group photo! Come on!"

He reluctantly walked back to the ship, not seeing any way he could refuse without seeming suspicious. Luffy jumped down from the ship.

"Where've you been? Hey, what's that on your mouth?"

"What . . . ?"

"There's something red on the corner . . ."

"Oh," said Sanji, quickly wiping it off, "they had some . . . tomato sauce samples somewhere in town."

"What!? Food!?"

Usopp called down "Hey, what's going on? Get up here, you two!"

Luffy sighed, grabbed Sanji, and stretched his arm up, bringing them both up. The others were in a group, clearly posing for the photo.

Luffy dragged Sanji to a place next to Nami and sat himself between the cook and Zoro. "Go on, Usopp, take the picture!"

Usopp lifted the camera up, but before he could press the button, Sanji thought fast and said quickly "Wait, Usopp, don't you want to be in the picture too? Maybe I'd better take it."

Usopp thought. "Uh . . . sure, okay, if you don't mind not being in it . . ."

He handed the camera to Sanji and positioned himself where Sanji had been. Sanji raised the camera and pressed the button. The photo came out nicely.

"Are we done?" Luffy asked, fidgeting. Without waiting for an answer, he jumped off the ship and yelled "Sanji, where was that food you had?"

Sanji pointed in a random direction.

"Thanks!" Luffy ran off in the direction Sanji had indicated.

The clouds were beginning to clear up, letting rays of sunlight shine through. Sanji hurried inside, claiming that he was going to start on dinner.


	4. Useful Information! How Will He Drink?

**I'm sorry it took me a while to get this one up. I came down with a cold, so my head hurts like all the time, and I recently cut my ring finger pretty badly, so it was difficult to curl it as necessary when typing. Plus I have an indent problem in Word that I can't figure out how to fix, so I spent a while on that.**

* * *

When moonrise came, Sanji felt tired—tired as if he had stayed up all night and morning was just arriving.

"Have fun staying up tonight, cook," Zoro said, passing by and slapping him on the back. "While the rest of us get a good night's sleep."

"Oh, it _is_ my turn, isn't it?" Sanji muttered. "Yeah, you get all the sleep you need, moss-head."

Zoro yawned. "Shut up. I'm tired." He wandered towards the men's sleeping quarters.

Sanji waited in the kitchen until everyone else had gone to bed. When at last he heard Usopp's soft snores coming from the men's quarters, he stepped outside and looked at the full moon.

"Full moon, huh . . ." he muttered. "Am I going to transform? No, wait, that's werewolves, isn't it . . . ?"

He set to thinking. Vampires were supposed to be nocturnal, right? That would explain his tiredness. Come to think of it, he didn't know much about vampires in general . . .

His eyes strayed to the small tower where the library was located.

* * *

"Vampires," he muttered to himself, scanning the shelves. "Vampires . . ."

Sanji's eyes lighted upon a book entitled Supernatural Beings. He pulled it off the shelf, flicked to the index, and turned to the page on vampires. He sat down to read the section.

All in all, he found some useful and interesting information:

A vampire feeds solely on blood. Blood can be obtained from humans or large animals. The vampire may also draw blood from the victim and store it in a container in a cold area, leaving it for a later meal.

Vampires are nocturnal. One of the three ways to kill a vampire is to force him into sunlight, where upon contact, will burn the skin of the vampire. The other two ways are to feed the vampire garlic (anything less than half a clove will merely make him sick) or to drive a wooden stake through his heart.

A few ways to recognize a vampire are thus:

When angry, a vampire's eyes will turn scarlet

A vampire has unusually pale skin

The canines of a vampire are slightly elongated

Vampires do not show up in mirrors or photographs

In order to enter a dwelling where he does not reside, the vampire must be invited into the dwelling by a resident. Otherwise, the vampire will be unable to enter.

Vampires are shape-shifters. They can turn into a cat, a bat, or a toad. They also have enhanced hearing and good vision in the dark.

When feeding directly off of a human, a vampire has two weapons at his disposal. The first is that a vampire can control the victim to a certain extent, but only if the victim is in direct sight—seeing the victim in a mirror or other reflective surface will not do. The things a vampire can force his victim to do are 'simple actions', which are basic limb movements and muted voice. For example, a vampire might force his victim to walk towards him, expose the part that will be drank from, and then hold still and silent while the vampire feeds. The other weapon is a partial memory wipe: When finished feeding, a vampire may stroke two fingers across the victim's forehead. The victim will sleep for approximately half an hour, and upon awaking, not remember coming into recent contact with the vampire.

If the vampire has not been invited into a home, he cannot control the resident if they are inside their home.

Sanji shut the book, stood up, returned it to the shelf, sat back down, and thought about what he had just read.

So he was nocturnal now . . . that would explain his tiredness. He needed sleep, though, so that might be difficult to hide from the others. Faking insomnia was an option, but that might result in Chopper checking up on him . . .

He'd need to continue drinking blood, and it was highly doubtful that he would be able to pull off the trick at the hospital again. Chopper had some blood bags in storage, right? But he might notice if they started disappearing daily . . .

He scratched his head. In the meantime, he'd have to find something to do. No one else was awake—

_Click . . . click . . . click . . ._

He cocked his head and listened. The sound was coming from another part of the ship—it was very faint, but definitely there. He got up and moved silently towards the noise, pausing every once in a while to listen. Once he heard a groan of frustration. He quickened his pace slightly.

Entering the kitchen, he saw a figure crouched over the refrigerator, scratching his head. Sanji took a step towards the figure and said "Turn around nice and slow so that I can see your face, you damn intruder."

The figure turned around. "Aah! Sanji! What're you doing here!?"

"Luffy!?"

Luffy stood up and looked at him in surprise. "Geez, you startled me!"

"You startled me, too! What the hell are you doing!?"

Luffy glanced at the refrigerator. "Uh . . . I was trying to figure out the combination for the fridge."

Sanji glowered at him. "You'll never figure it out. Get out of here and get back to bed!"

Luffy sighed dejectedly and started to make his way for the door, but stopped and turned back. "Hey, how'd you know I was in here?"

"Intuition. Get out!"

Luffy shrugged and walked out the door. Sanji suddenly realized how hungry he was as his stomach growled.

"Er, wait, Luffy!"

Luffy turned around. "Huh?"

"Uh . . ." Sanji hesitated. "Never mind."

Luffy shut the door behind him, presumably heading back to the men's quarters.

Sanji sighed. Feeding from another human—especially one of his friends—was something he would have to become accustomed to. But in the meantime . . .

He snuck down to the infirmary and opened the miniature icebox, where several packs of blood rested. He glanced around, took one out, rearranged them to make it look like nothing had disturbed them, and shut the lid. He crept back to the kitchen, got out a glass, and carefully poured the blood into it. After going outside, sticking a rock into the bag, and tossing it into the ocean, he went back to the kitchen and drank the slightly sticky red liquid slowly, making sure to wash the glass well afterwards.

* * *

The sun started to rise. Sanji yawned, scratched his head, and started on breakfast. He mixed up the flour and milk, cracked some eggs, tossed in some butter, and soon had delicious-looking steaming pancakes stacked on the table.

"Nami-_swan_, Robin-_chwan_~!" he yelled. "Breakfast is ready, darlings~!"

As he started to make up the coffee for Robin, he yelled "Morons! Get in here! Food time!"

The men poured into the kitchen almost immediately, Zoro being the last, and the women following behind.

Luffy grabbed several pancakes, stuffed them into his mouth, grabbed some butter, stuffed that into his mouth as well, poured some syrup into his mouth, and then swallowed the mass whole. Usopp made a face.

"Geez, Luffy, how do you not swallow your own tongue?"

Luffy started choking.

"Did you swallow your tongue!?"

He nodded.

Chopper ran over to him, deftly reached into his mouth, and got his tongue out. Luffy gasped. "Thanks . . ."

And he kept eating.

"Coffee, darling Nami-_swan,_ sweet Robin-_chwan_~?" Sanji offered up the pot.

"Yes, please, with a little bit of cream and sugar," Nami said cheerfully.

"Thank you, Sanji," Robin smiled.

As Sanji poured the coffee, Nami frowned. "Sanji-_kun_, you look a bit pale . . ."

He glanced at his hand. Indeed, it was paler than it usually was. He turned it over, examining the color. "I-It seems normal to me," Sanji said, mentally kicking himself again and then wincing at the imagined pain. "I did stay up all night on watch."

Robin narrowed her eyes slightly.

"Make sure to get some sleep today, Sanji!" Chopper exclaimed worriedly.

"Yeah, yeah," Sanji muttered, stifling a yawn.


	5. Chopper Attacks! Sanji's in Trouble!

Sanji fell asleep that morning in the kitchen, using a dishtowel as a pillow. He was later rudely awakened by Luffy, who had wandered in for lunch. Sanji glanced outside at the sun and agreed that it _was_ time to make lunch.

"Why were you sleeping in the kitchen, Sanji?" Luffy asked, grinning as he drummed his hands on the kitchen table and the cook began to prepare lunch. "Were you trying to be funny?"

Sanji glared at him. "I was tired and the kitchen was the most convenient place to sleep."

"Why didn't you go to bed?"

"This is closer," he muttered. Of course, due to the bright sun, he _couldn't_ go outside unless he wanted to be burned to a crisp—but he didn't mention this to Luffy.

"Do you know if anyone's getting lunch somewhere else?"

Luffy put a finger to his chin. "Uh . . . I think . . . Nami and Robin are in town . . . and Franky too . . . and I dunno about Zoro, but everyone else is here!"

"All right. Hey, do me a favor and go find moss-head—just check to see if he's on the ship. Can you handle that?"

Luffy nodded and ran out of the room. By the time he returned, Sanji had finished the sandwiches. He looked up. "Well?"

"Zoro's not here."

"Good, I didn't make any for him anyway. Now go get the others."

Luffy whined, but Sanji kicked him out of the kitchen. Usopp and Chopper came in a minute later, following Luffy. The three sat at the table while Sanji served up the sandwiches.

"Have you been in here all morning, Sanji?" Usopp asked through his sandwich. "I haven't seen you around."

"Shanji wash shleepin' on the floor!" Luffy said, trying to speak around the sandwich in his mouth.

"Why were you sleeping on the floor?" Chopper asked curiously.

Sanji gave the same excuse he'd given Luffy.

"Sanji, next time just go to bed! Sleeping on the floor's not good for your health!"

"I'll be fine," Sanji said, yawning hugely.

Chopper frowned. "Are you sure you're okay? You still seem really pale, and you look really sleepy."

"I told you, I'm f-f-fine," Sanji repeated, yawning in the middle of his sentence.

Chopper pulled out a stethoscope and ran behind the counter to Sanji. "Let me listen to your heart, Sanji! I need to give you a checkup!"

Sanji dodged the stethoscope. "Oi!"

"Hold still!"

"I told you, I'm fine!" As he dodged Chopper's stethoscope attacks, Sanji pressed two fingers to his neck to confirm what he already knew: That his heart was not beating.

"This'll only take a few seconds!" Chopper exclaimed, trying again and again, to no avail, to listen to Sanji's still heart.

"Go Chopper, go!" Luffy and Usopp cheered, waving flags at the table.

"You two go away!" Sanji yelled, now dodging Chopper's hypodermic needle as he tried to sedate Sanji. "Chopper, I swear to god if you don't cut it out you're not getting dinner!"

Chopper stopped. He looked up at Sanji with pleading, wet eyes. "N-No dinner . . . ?"

Sanji held up his hands. "S-Sorry, just kidding, of course you get dinner—"

"Okay!"

And he began his stethoscope/needle attacks with renewed vigor.

Eventually, Chopper changed into Heavy Point and sat on Sanji, thus pinning him to the floor. Luffy and Usopp cheered, sitting on the counter and watching the spectacle, the sandwiches gone.

"Let me go! Oi!" Sanji squirmed under Chopper's weight. He briefly considered using his new mind-control powers, but he banished the idea, due to the fact that he was not used to them yet and that would make it all the more obvious that something was up with him.

Chopper readied his stethoscope. "Okay, just give me a minute!"

The rounded end came closer and closer to Sanji's skin. He wriggled and twisted, but he was stuck under the doctor, there was no escape now, they would all find out—

"What's going on?"

Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper looked around to see Nami entering the kitchen. "What the hell?" Nami asked. "Where's Sanji-_kun_?"

"Down here, Nami-_swan_!" Sanji's eyes became hearts and he turned his head around, trying to catch a glimpse of his beloved.

Nami peered over the counter. "Sanji-_kun_! Chopper! What—?"

"I think Sanji's sick!" Chopper said. "I'm trying to check his heart, but he wouldn't let me."

"Uh-huh," Nami said. "Well, I was hoping to get someone's help with the packages, but if Sanji-_kun_'s busy . . ."

Sanji started to squirm. "Of course I'll help, Nami-_swan_, but this guy won't let me up!"

"Just let me check your heart!"

"As soon as possible, Sanji-_kun_."

* * *

"Sanji, come back as soon as possible, okay?" Chopper yelled as Sanji left the kitchen. Sanji raised a hand in response.

He had covered his head, neck, and hands with dishtowels in order to protect himself from the sun. He had excused this by saying that if he was sick, then he should stay covered up outside. Chopper had seemed suspicious of this, but let it go.

After he helped Nami carry in the packages, he hurried back to the kitchen, shut the door, and tore off the dishtowels. To his dismay, Luffy and Usopp had left, but Chopper was still there with his stethoscope. Before he could do anything, the doctor had grabbed him (in Heavy Point) and sat on him again.

"You can't just tie me to a chair!?" Sanji complained.

Chopper lowered his stethoscope, tugged down the collar of Sanji's shirt, and pressed the metal end to his skin. Sanji flinched at the cold metal. Chopper frowned, moving the instrument around as he tried to locate the place.

"I can't find it," he muttered finally. "Sanji, why can't I find your heartbeat?"


	6. Keep it Secret! Chopper's Promise!

"Sanji?" Chopper repeated. "Can you help me find your heartbeat?"

Sanji's thoughts were racing. There was no way to mimic a heartbeat in the position he was in now (or mimic one at all); there was no way to run away; Chopper wouldn't be distracted by something else at this point; no one was coming in the door to save him. . .

"Sanji?" Chopper said again.

"Chopper," said Sanji. "Let me up."

The doctor must have detected something in his tone, because he stood up and allowed him to rise. Sanji glanced at the windows, making sure that no one was near, and then turned back to Chopper.

"Chopper," he said. "I'm going to tell you something, and I want you to promise that you won't completely freak out. Also, you _cannot_ tell anyone else. Got it?"

Chopper hesitated, and then nodded, looking at bit scared. He turned back into his small form.

"Okay," Sanji said, leaning against the counter. "I'm a vampire."

Chopper screamed. Sanji grabbed him and covered his mouth. The tiny doctor flailed around for a minute before calming down.

"Be _quiet_," Sanji hissed. Chopper nodded and Sanji released him. He stood on his own again, looking up at Sanji slightly fearfully and curiously.

"Anyway," Sanji continued, "that's why you couldn't find a heartbeat: I don't have one."

Chopper found his voice. "H-How? And how long?"

Sanji yawned. "How long, since yesterday morning at least. How, I don't know. I just woke up and . . ." he gestured to himself.

Chopper stared at him, some of the fear in his expression dissipating. "Is that why you look pale, too?"

"I guess so. And I'm guessing my canine teeth are longer than what's normal for a human."

Chopper jumped up onto the counter and made a gesture. Sanji opened his mouth and let Chopper examine his teeth.

"Yep," he said. "They're a bit longer than they should be. But, Sanji . . ."

"Mm?"

"Why can't we tell everyone?"

"Simple," Sanji said. "I wouldn't be able to stand it if my Nami-_swan_ and Robin-_chwan_ saw me as a monster."

"B-But you're not a monster, really," Chopper said, trying to comfort him. "I mean, you don't even look that different—"

"My problem, my decision," Sanji said in a tone that indicated finality. Chopper sighed.

"Okay, I won't tell anyone else . . ."

"There is something I need your help with, though," he said confidentially. "Since I'm like this now . . . I, well, can't eat regular food. You know?"

"What—oh!" Chopper's eyes widened in understanding. "You want me to help you get blood for you? How?"

"I don't know . . . to be honest, though," he added, feeling a mite guilty, "I already took one of your blood packs last night. Sorry."

"Sanji!"

"Sorry!"

Chopper looked down. "I don't know how I'll get you blood. I could get some from the hospital—"

Sanji explained what had happened with him and the hospital.

"Oh, so _that's_ why Robin gave me the blood pack," Chopper said. "I forgot to thank you for that . . . but can't you just, um—" he opened his mouth and put his hooves to his teeth, mimicking fangs.

"I'll do that as a last resort," Sanji said firmly. "Please, can't you think of an alternative?"

"I can try," Chopper said, looking uncomfortable. "It won't be easy. You can't just go up to someone and ask for their blood."

"I know. Thanks, Chopper—I appreciate it." Sanji patted Chopper's head. "I'm going back to sleep. I'm nocturnal now, if you didn't know."

"Oh, right," Chopper said as the cook laid down back where he was. "But I want to perform a full examination on you later—"

"Get out of here before I take a bite out of you."

Chopper fled the kitchen.

* * *

Sanji woke once again, later that day, to Luffy shaking him. "Saaanji . . . wake up . . . I'm huuuungry . . ."

"Is it time for dinner?" Sanji muttered, still on the floor.

"My stomach says it is."

Sanji checked the time. "Huh. Your stomach's right for once." He got up. "Honestly, I'm surprised that you didn't come in here sooner. Not that I wanted you to."

"I tried," Luffy admitted, "but Chopper said not to and to wait 'til dinner."

Making a mental note to thank Chopper later, Sanji nodded. "I'll get started then. Now go away."

"But I'm hungry!"

"And the food won't be ready for a while. Go play with Usopp or something."

Luffy huffed and shuffled out of the kitchen. Sanji rolled up his sleeves and got started.

A half-hour later, a delicious-looking clam chowder was being carefully laden into separate bowls. Sanji garnished two of the bowls with oyster crackers (arranged into the shape of a heart) and yelled for everyone.

As the sun set, the rest of the Strawhats entered the kitchen. Luffy was the first, sitting down before Sanji could set down any bowls. As he was finishing setting the table, Zoro finally came in and sat down.

"For you, Nami-_swan_, Robin-_chwan_," Sanji said, presenting them each with a bowl of chowder and crackers.

"Hey!" Luffy said indignantly, peering into the bowls and spotting the crackers. "Where're my crackers?"

Sanji grabbed a few and chucked them into his chowder. "Happy?"

"Yep!"

As Sanji threw crackers into everyone else's chowder (after they raised complaints), Chopper looked up at him. Sanji looked back. Through a series of subtle gestures and grimaces, they managed to have a silent conversation that went something like this:

_I'm sorry; I couldn't find a way to get blood for you!_

_ Ugh. Thanks for trying, Chopper. You haven't told anyone, have you?_

_ No. No one knows except us._

_ Good. If there's no other way, then—wait, is it okay if I just drink one of the packs from your office again?_

_ Those are for emergencies!_

_ Keeping me alive isn't an emergency? Fine, never mind. If there are really no other options available, I'll have to go out tonight and find someone._

_ Are you sure?_

_ No, but I'm doing it anyway._

_ Okay, if you're sure. Don't forget to come by my office before I go to bed for a checkup._

_ Whatever._

_ Sanji!_

"More crackers, Nami-_swan_, Robin-_chwan_?"

Chopper folded his arms and glared at Sanji.


	7. Usopp and Robin! Suspicions Arise!

"Are you _done _yet?" Sanji grumbled, leaning against the wall in Chopper's office.

"Mm-hm! Just finished!" Chopper said, hopping down from his seat. "Make sure to get some sleep before you do anything tonight! And by the way . . ."

"Yeah?"

"I told the others that you're sick. I said that your disease isn't contagious, so the food is safe, but it makes you tired all the time and you shouldn't go outside."

"Hey, thanks, Chopper!" Sanji said in gratitude. "That's pretty clever of you!"

Chopper grinned and started dancing. "Y-You idiot! Your praise doesn't make me happy! Just go already, you bastard~!"

Sanji was halfway out the door when he thought of something. Turning back, he said "Hey, Chopper . . . ?"

"What?" Chopper asked. "What is it?"

"Is it okay if I practice . . . mind-control on you?"

"Eh?"

* * *

Sanji left the clinic a few minutes later, having successfully forced Chopper to walk back and forth, hold very still, and go mute. Chopper said that he hadn't felt anything strange afterwards, aside from being slightly creeped out. He went to the men's room—Chopper had said that he should sleep on his bed, since it was better for him than the hard kitchen floor.

He entered the men's room to snores and sleep-mumbles. He grumbled a bit and lied down on his bed.

When he woke up, he sensed that a few hours had passed. Chopper was in his bed now, fast asleep. He got up as quietly as possible and crept outside.

The moon was covered by clouds tonight, throwing everything into shadow, but Sanji could see just fine. As he moved towards the railing, his shoes made clacking sounds against the deck, though he didn't think this mattered. He leaned against the railing, looked out at the town (in which a few lights shone through windows) and sighed.

"What to do . . . ?" he muttered. "I guess a lot of people are sleeping right now . . . can I do it without waking them up? Or maybe—"

"H-Hey! Turn around so I can see you, v-villain! I'll have you know that I have 8,000 men working under me!"

Sanji turned around to see Usopp facing him with his slingshot ready to fire. Oh, right, he was on duty tonight.

"Wait . . . Sanji?" Usopp asked. "Is that you?"

"Yeah," Sanji said. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Oh, thank god," Usopp said, relieved, lowering his weapon. "I saw someone moving around, but it's dark, so I couldn't tell who—wait, what are you doing outside?" He tilted his head. "Aren't you sick? Chopper said you were tired all the time and had to stay indoors . . ."

Sanji thought fast. Usopp had seen him outside and wide awake. Surely he would suspect something, possibly telling the others. But if he didn't remember Sanji being outside in the first place . . . and Sanji _did_ have to drink . . .

Sanji swallowed nervously. "Let's go up to the crow's nest."

"Huh?" Usopp said. "Why?"

"Because otherwise I'll have to use my foot to erase your memory instead."

"What?"

"Nothing."

Usopp scratched his head and followed the cook up to the observation deck. As he closed the hatch behind him, he turned to him and said "Is there something you wanna ask me, or what? Why'd we have to come up here?"

Sanji steeled himself and faced Usopp. "Usopp," he said in a commanding voice, "hold still."

Usopp froze in place. "W-What—what's going on!?"

"Don't say anything," Sanji commanded, moving towards him. Usopp's eyes widened slightly as he fell unwillingly silent. The cook stood in front of him and swallowed nervously again. He had to remind himself that he wasn't going to take _all _his blood, and Usopp wouldn't remember this, anyway.

He carefully tilted Usopp's head to the side, exposing his neck and giving him enough room to place his mouth. He opened his mouth and bit down as gently as possible with his elongated canines. They pierced the soft skin, allowing crimson blood to well up. He placed his mouth over the wounds and sucked out the thin liquid.

When he sensed that he had drunk enough, he moved back and looked at Usopp. The sniper opened his mouth. "San—"

"Quiet," Sanji commanded, and Usopp fell silent again, looking up at him with fear. If he had been able to move, he surely would have run away.

"Usopp," Sanji said, holding out the first two fingers of his right hand. "Sorry."

He placed them on Usopp's forehead and wiped them across. Almost immediately, Usopp's eyes slipped shut and he began to snore. Sanji picked him up and carried him over to the bench, where hopefully he would wake later and believe that he had fallen asleep by himself. Noticing the two small holes he had made in Usopp's neck, Sanji took a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped the place clean. Since the wounds were small, they would probably heal by morning.

Stealing one last guilty glance at his sleeping friend, Sanji vacated the area and went back down to the deck. Since there wasn't much to do on the Sunny at night, and Usopp was already on guard, he decided to head into the town to go lady-hunting.

* * *

Seeing the gray light starting to peek over the horizon in the east, Sanji went back to the ship as quickly as possible. In case Usopp was already awake, he was sure to stay in the shadows and out of sight. In this fashion, he stole away to the kitchen, where to the others it would seem he had spent the entire night. He rolled up his sleeves, washed his hands, and got started on breakfast.

Soon enough, Luffy found his way into the kitchen, placed his chin on the counter, and stared at the food longingly.

"Go away," Sanji said without preamble.

Luffy looked up at the cook. He took off his hat, held it in front of his chin, and made puppy-dog eyes.

"I said go away, dammit!" Sanji exclaimed. "Making cute faces won't get you any food from me!"

Luffy sighed and put his hat back on. He went back to staring longingly at the food.

Sanji kicked him out of the kitchen.

Once the croissants were finished, he yelled that breakfast was ready. The crew spilled into the room while Sanji served up the food. He glanced guiltily at Usopp, who seemed to be acting normally.

"How was watch last night, Usopp?" he asked in what he hoped was a convincingly casual voice.

Usopp looked down. "Well . . . I fell asleep . . ."

"Usopp," Zoro said sternly, "you can't go falling asleep on watch. What if someone attacked?"

"Says the one who'll fall asleep anywhere," Nami muttered. "Coffee with milk, please, Sanji-_kun_."

"Of course, Nami-_swan_~!"

As Sanji mixed in the milk, Robin spoke. "How are you feeling today, Sanji?"

"Eh?" he remembered that he was supposed to be sick. "Ah, Robin-_chwan_, thank you for thinking of me~! I'm tired, of course, but otherwise fine!"

"Hm. May I have more coffee?"

Chopper looked at Sanji as he poured the coffee. He asked with his eyes if Sanji had accomplished what he had set out to do last night. Sanji gave him a subtle nod and a slight jerk of the head towards Usopp. Chopper's eyes widened and he looked worriedly at Usopp. Sanji indicated that Usopp was fine.

"I did have a weird dream," Usopp said after a moment. "I saw you out on deck, Sanji . . ."

"Yeah?" Sanji asked nervously. "Did I say anything?"

"Hm . . . you told me to come with you . . ." he frowned. "That's all I remember."

Sanji let out an internal sigh of relief and made sure to give Usopp a slightly bigger helping than usual.

* * *

Usopp was looking for Luffy and Chopper, in hopes of starting a new game, when he felt a tap on his shoulder. Turning around, he saw a hand sprouting out of the wall next to him. There was an eye and ear next to it.

"Robin?" he asked. "What is it?"

The hand pointed downwards.

"Below deck? Where?"

The hand made some wave motions.

"The aquarium?"

The hand gave a thumbs-up before vanishing with the eye and ear. Usopp shrugged and went to the aquarium.

Robin was waiting for him, sitting on the bench in front of the glass.

"Good morning, Usopp," she greeted.

"Hey, Robin," he said, sitting next to her. "What is it?"

She was silent for a moment. "Have you noticed that Sanji has been acting . . . a bit strangely as of late?"

"Strangely . . . ? Wait, Chopper said he was sick, right? So—"

"About that," Robin interrupted. She held up something. "I took this from Sanji's shoe earlier."

Usopp looked at the object. It was a blade of grass.

"If he is truly sick," she said, "then why is he walking around outside at night?"

"Weird . . ." he muttered.

"I believe that there's something else going on with him, something that either he asked Chopper to cover for or that Chopper wants to keep secret." She looked at him. "What do you think?"

"If you're right," he muttered, "then . . . he probably asked Chopper to cover for him. I can't see Chopper doing that by himself."

"I think so too," she agreed. "Now, the question is: What could be wrong with Sanji that would prevent him from going outside in the daytime, making him tired at least during the day, and have paler skin?"

"I dunno," he said confusedly. "And I don't know why he'd want to keep it a secret . . . but wait."

"Yes?"

He looked at her. "Why did you tell me this?"

"Hm?"

"I would think that you'd keep this to yourself . . . so why?"

"Well," she said, "I believe that you are one of the smartest of our crew in certain situations. I couldn't tell Luffy because he would most likely let the secret slip; I couldn't tell Zoro because he might use any information against Sanji as blackmail; the same with Nami-_chan_; Chopper, of course, would tell Sanji that I'm suspicious of him, assuming that he is indeed covering for him; and Franky is . . . a bit too ostentatious."

"Y-You really think so?" Usopp asked, beaming, focusing on the part about him being one of the smartest.

"Not only that," she added, "but now, if one of us were eliminated, the other would still have the knowledge."

Usopp groaned. "You're so pessimistic!"


	8. Piecing it Together! One Final Test!

**"Happiness is watching anime while wrapped up in a warm blanket and having chocolate in one hand and soda in the other."**

**-pingo1387**

* * *

"Okay," said Usopp, taking out paper and a pen and placing the pen onto the paper. "Sanji's really tired during day, but apparently not at night . . ." he wrote this down. "His skin is pretty damn pale . . ." he wrote this down as well. "What else?"

"His hand brushed mine the other day," Robin said. "It felt unusually cold."

"Cold skin . . . okay, anything else?"

"Nothing comes to mind at the moment."

"Hm . . . Sanji's sleeping in the kitchen right now, right?"

"Yes."

"So . . . how about we go up there and take a closer look?" Usopp stood up.

"Fine," Robin agreed. "But I'll examine him from the outside of the kitchen. I wouldn't want him to wake up and find us standing over him."

They headed up to the kitchen. Once outside, Robin closed her eyes and formed an X with her arms. If you were to look inside, you would see a hand sprout on the ground near where the sleeping cook lied, and an eye on the wall next to it.

First, Robin gently touched Sanji's hand. The cook twitched, but didn't wake. She opened one eye and said "He's definitely colder than he should be. But other than that, and the fact that he's asleep, there isn't anything else unusual about him. But . . ."

"Yeah?" Usopp asked, pen at the ready.

"Wait." Concentrating, she sprouted a chain of arms, placing an eye on the end of the last one. With this strange method, she scanned the kitchen. After a moment she said "That's odd. There's no sign of him having eaten recently."

Usopp frowned. "He's not eating? Come to think of it . . . I don't think he's been using the bathroom, either. He hasn't left the kitchen in a long time—except at night, apparently."

"It's interesting," Robin said after vanishing the arms and eyes inside the kitchen. "Sleeping during the day, combined with moving about at night and apparently eating at night (if at all), would imply that he's nocturnal."

"What? But . . ." Usopp said. "How?"

"I'm not sure," Robin said calmly, though an idea was forming in her mind. "It's not exactly a normal thing for someone to become nocturnal when previously they were diurnal, correct?"

"Definitely not," Usopp muttered. "So . . . he's probably nocturnal . . ." he said as he wrote this down. "Wait! I have it!"

"You know what the matter with him is?" Robin asked in surprise.

"Yeah! See, he must have found a cursed mirror, and he traded places with—"

Robin gave him a frosty glare. Usopp cowered.

"S-Sorry . . ."

"As you should be; now, I have an idea, but I'll need to test something first. Sanji does keep a small hand mirror in the kitchen, yes?"

"Yeah," Usopp said. "Why, what—"

Robin shut her eyes and ignored him, crossing her arms again and this time using her powers to open up the drawers in the kitchen until she found the mirror. She quietly took it out and held it up in such a way that it reflected the place where Sanji should have shown up.

But the mirror reflected only the floor beneath him.

Usopp saw her tense. "What's wrong? What are you doing?"

Before answering, Robin quietly returned the mirror to its proper place, shut the drawer, and got rid of the hands. She opened her eyes and looked at Usopp.

"What's wrong?" Usopp repeated.

"I held up the mirror," Robin said in a troubled voice, "and it showed the place where Sanji was . . ."

"And . . . ?" prompted Usopp.

"And it reflected everything that was supposed to be there," she replied. "Everything . . . except Sanji himself."

Usopp dropped the notepad, which landed on the deck with a _thump_. "H-He didn't show up in the mirror?"

"Correct."

Usopp was starting to piece it together. "Nocturnal . . . cold and pale skin . . . not eating . . . not showing up in a mirror . . . not going outside in the day . . ."

It all clicked.

"H-He . . . S-Sanji's a v—"

Robin covered his mouth. "Shh," she scolded. "What if someone were to hear you? Let's go back to the aquarium room."

Usopp nodded, unable to do much else with his mouth covered.

Once they had reached the aquarium, Usopp started screaming. Robin slapped him. He blinked. "S-Sorry . . ."

"That was to calm you down and for what you said about the cursed mirror. Now," she continued, "all signs point to him being a vampire—don't you agree?"

He nodded nervously.

"But," she continued, "We don't have definite proof yet. We haven't actually seen him feed; it may in fact be only a strange illness, as Chopper claims. Tonight, after dinner, I can follow him into town—if he indeed goes—and find out what he does."

"That sounds good . . ." Usopp mumbled. "But, uh, Robin?"

"Yes?"

"Please, _please_ don't say 'feed'. It's really creepy."

"Would you prefer I say 'drink'?" she suggested lightly.

"'s not much better," Usopp grumbled.


End file.
